Home Is Where The Heart Is
by The-Ruby-Butterfly
Summary: When Bella decides to go travelling to 'find herself' the last thing she expected was to spend her summer in one place. After meeting people she instantly bonds with, will she run again or will she realise home is where the heart is? AU OOC BxE
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I own nothing. I'm just using the characters as creative output and as a way to put off doing revision and coursework.

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**Prologue**

I'm running and running but I can't see him. My feet are pounding against the smooth floor and my shoes are making loud noises in the echoing space but I don't care. The beating in my heart tells me that I need to find him before its too late but I can't get there. I push people out the way, getting dirty looks from mothers and leering glances from the men. I can't stop to think how I look right now, I just know I have to make it to him.

As my body runs so does my mind. I see snippets of my life since he entered it and how happy I was and I see our smiles. I see his fierce protectiveness. I see our longing glances across the room at each other. I see the first night we shared when things changed. I see every passionate argument that ended in violent kisses.

Then I see last night and every fibre of my being screams at me for saying what I said and for doing what I did. I hate myself for it. I pushed him away just like I pushed everyone away, using words to make him leave. My mind gives me a sudden thought that he must hate me as I hate myself. This new revelation causes a falter in my running and I slow down to a complete stop. Why am I running to something that doesn't want to be stopped? Something that doesn't want to be stopped because of me.

Its in this moment that I realise I'm crying. Tears are streaming down my face and I do nothing to stop them. The emotional rollercoaster my life has been on over the past 24 hours has taken its toll on me and I'm breaking at the core. I can almost feel my heart splitting down the middle, half of it soon to be leaving me just like him.

"Bella?"

Isn't it enough that my heart is breaking, but does my mind need to turn on me too? Why does my consciousness want to punish me by making me believe he's here? That he cares?

I look up and realise that I'm not going mad, that he really is there. He's standing there in his camouflage uniform and he's holding his carry on bag at his side. His other hand is running through his hair, which from the unruly state it's safe to assume his hand has barely left his hair, and his faces looks as tormented and pained as I feel inside. He has never been more beautiful to me. His bright green eyes latch onto mine and the bag falls from his hands and hits the ground.

"Bella."

This time my name is more like a whimper, a prayer, begging for something. For what exactly escapes me as all I can do is stand there and stare at him. My heart aches for him, for us, for the life we should have, not the one we've been forced into by cruel acts of fate. I can't bare to be apart from him for a second longer, whether he wants me anymore or not.

"Edward!" His name comes out like a sob and we're both running towards each other. His arms open and as soon as I'm close enough I jump into his embrace. I wrap my legs around his waist and my arms are around his neck, clinging on as if my life depends on it, my forehead goes to rest on his. One of his arms wraps around my back to support me and then he places his hand on my face, gently stroking my cheek.

"I'm sorry" I manage to choke out between sobs. "I love you, don't leave. Please don't leave me!" My hands leave his neck to fist themselves in his collar, almost securing him to me. I see his beautiful eyes fill up with tears and it's more than I can bare.

"Bella." After saying my name, one single tear runs down his cheek and I kiss it away. "I love you. I'll always love you. I don't want to leave and if there were anything on this earth that I could do to stay with you then I'd do it in a heartbeat."

An announcement breaks up our tearful declarations. "This is the final boarding call for the military flight 217. Would all US Military personnel please make their way to terminal 3."

The fear I feel on my face is reflected on his and I start kissing any part of his face I can reach. His hands reach up to frame my face and push me away a slight distance so he can stare, almost as if he's trying to commit my face to memory. "I love you, B" and with that last sentence he pulls me in for one last kiss.

My lips crash to his and they meld together in the perfect way they always have done. Our teeth and tongues clash as we try and say everything we can't out loud.

I'm sorry for leaving.

I didn't mean what I said.

I forgive you.

Goodbye.

I unwrap my legs from his waist and he places me on the floor gently. He reaches down to my left hand and presses my fingers against his lips. With a sad smile he turns from me, picks up his bag and walks away without a single glance back.

I collapse on the ground and embrace the blackness that's forced from the sorrow.

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Okay so this is my first attempt at anything slightly fanfiction-ish.

I don't want to beg for reviews, but feedback will be greatly appreciated as I'm not sure whether to carry this on or not.

Peace&Love.  
x


	2. A One Way Ticket To A Long Way From Home

**Disclaimer: I own nothing. I'm just using the pre-formed characters as a distraction from revision.**

**Chapter Title: The Other Side Of The Sun - Joe Brooks**

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My entire senior class knew what they wanted to do with their lives. My friend Jess wanted to move go to UCLA and study PR. Angela and her boyfriend Ben were going to Dartmouth and were going to be pre-med. Even Jake who was a junior knew he wanted to own his own garage.

But me? I had no idea. My grades were good, I was reasonably well liked and I cooked a pretty decent lasagne. How would that help me in future life?

But most of the time although it was my life, I didn't really feel like I was living. I didn't have all those experiences to 'tell the grandkids' and I had never felt any real emotions like love, and lust, and anger. I just sort of existed, coasting through my own life and I was sick of it. I wanted to live. At age 18 I had no idea who I was as a person. I didn't know what I believed in, I didn't know what I had passions for, I didn't know myself.

Now don't get me wrong, I loved my Charlie, my loving if slightly awkward father, and Renee, my erratic spontaneous mother, and I was so grateful for the life they had given me so far but it just wasn't enough for me. I needed more. When ever I watched films and I saw the different locations I got sucked in to the culture of the place, how different it was to my normal life.

So I decided what better way to live than to travel? I thought that by having the experiences I craved I could learn things about myself that I'd never had the opportunity to before.

I got a job at Newton's Camping Store and worked through my last year of high school to save up. I figured that if I had money to start me off, then I could go to one place, find a job there, stay for a while and save up then move on again. All the while I was planning for this, I was applying to Colleges across the country to please my unsuspecting parents.

I'll never forget the night I sat Charlie down and told him I wasn't going to College.

"You're doing WHAT?" Charlie's face instantly went red .

"I'm not going to go to College. I want to travel." I saw his hands grip the chair arms and his knuckles were starting to go white.

"Like hell you are. There's no way I'm letting you go gallivanting across the world on your own! Anything could happen."

"Ch-Dad, I'll be fine. I'm not planning on doing anything dangerous. I just want to see the world."

"If you don't go to school, you'll ruin your chances in life. With no education what career are you going to have?"

"No offense Dad, but there's more to life than a career."

I regretted those last words as soon as I said them. Charlie spent most of his life at the police station and he was the Chief. He loved his job and although I sometimes wished he'd spend a bit more time at home I'd never fault him for doing what he loved.

I watched as all the colour in his face drained away and I wanted to rewind time to 30 seconds ago and stop myself saying what I did.

"I guess you're more like your mother than I thought, Bells."

It was safe to assume that wasn't meant as a compliment. My mom left me and Charlie when I was a baby because she was sick of him working all the time and I used to go see her up in Phoenix every summer. She was more like a child than me, always acting on impulse. I guessed that's what my Dad thought I was doing then.

He got up and walked into the kitchen and I ran after him, I needed to make him understand.

"Dad, you know I'm more like you than Mom." I watched as Charlie pulled out a beer from the fridge and sat at the kitchen table, head in his hands. "I've thought all this through. I've been saving up and I'm not even going to leave the country for a while yet. How is me leaving to travel any different than me leaving to go to College? I'd be on my own either way, just this way I'll be in lots of different places. I need to do this Dad."

He took his head out of his hands and looked up at me stood in the doorway. He let out a huge sigh.

"I understand it and I accept it, but don't expect me to like it Bells."

I left the doorframe I was leaning against to go over to him. I bent down and kissed his cheek.

"That's all I ask Dad."

"You have to break it to your mother that you're not going to Phoenix this year though."

That was a conversation I wasn't looking forward to.

Over the next few months my plans had started to take shape. I decided after spending most of my life in the cold state of Washington that I wanted to go south for a bit and decided on going to Austin, Texas. My mom was surprisingly okay with my plans.

"Oh sweetie, as much as I'll miss you this summer I must admit I'm rather jealous. I've always wanted to travel. You do what makes you happy darling."

Her lack of reaction was not what Charlie was expecting which put him in a unbreakable grumpy mood for a week. But after that even he started to get involved with what I was doing. He first started showing an interest one evening when I had a map of Texas on the kitchen table and the laptop showing motel rooms.

"What's in Texas?"

"I don't know, Dad. That's why I'm going."

He nodded and pulled out the chair next to me, looking thoroughly confused.

"You're staying in a motel?"

"Well I don't know how long I'd be staying. I'm not planning on moving there."

"Well what are you doing about your car? You're not driving all the way to Texas are you?"

I'd had my big red truck since I was 15, a birthday present from my Dad. I loved it like I'd love a child but it was ancient and falling to pieces. I wasn't sure how much more life it had in it.

"Dad, you and I both know that if I tried to drive The Beast down to Texas I wouldn't even make it out of the state. I'll probably fly down and then ship my truck down to me."

"That's true Bells and probably the best idea." Charlie chuckled to himself as he went back into the living room.

Sooner than I thought was possible, finals were done and it was the night before graduation. I'd just cooked some Spaghetti Bolognese and Charlie and I were sitting down to eat.

"It's not too late to change your mind you know kiddo."

I looked up from my food to see Charlie staring down into his, as if it held the answers to the worlds unanswered questions, resolutely avoiding my gaze.

"I know. I just don't want to change my mind. I'm leaving in two days. Everything sorted. I'll admit I'm nervous, but it's a good nervous. You said you understood."

"I do but is it so wrong that I want to spend more time with my little girl before she goes off on her own?"

"No dad. There's nothing wrong with that." We shared an awkward smile and carried on eating, neither of us had been good with emotional exchanges. We both knew nothing more had been achieved in that conversation other than me knowing he was going to miss me.

Graduation was a blur. I remember an inexplicable amount of blue. Blue gowns, blue hats, blue seats, blue stage, blue everything. I remember the droning voice of our Principle saying the same speech he's probably said a thousand times at every graduation about how we're all going on to better things and how we'll all remain friends for life or something along those lines.

The one thing that stood out to me was during Eric Yorkie's valedictorian speech.

"An English author named Geoff Dyer once said 'Have regrets, they are fuel'. I think this means that it's okay to mess up and have regrets because they are the fuel our lives. They make give us experiences and force us to try again and do better all at the same time. In school if we mess up it's okay because we can just try again the next day, but real life isn't like that. Personally, I can't wait to make my own regrets."

Then hats where being thrown into the air and I was being hugged from every direction from friends and teachers but I couldn't make out a single face. I was being told by everyone how proud they were of me and I couldn't help wondering what they were proud of, all I did was go through compulsory education.

Before I knew it I was in Charlie's police cruiser heading home. When we turned the corner into our drive I expected to see my big old truck like always. I didn't expect to see a bright blue '65 Mustang in its place. My head whipped round to ask Charlie whose car that was, and where was my truck?

"Before you ask, it's yours." He said, his hands held up in defence mode as I opened my mouth to protest. "Hell, I know you loved your truck Bells but I couldn't let you be thousands of miles away from me driving that thing, I'd be worried sick. So I got you this as a graduation and a leaving present. Your Mom chipped in too."

I was astounded. I had no idea Charlie was so worried but if that resulted in a new car then I wasn't complaining. I let out an extremely girly and embarrassing squeal and wrapped my arms around my Dad saying "thank you, thank you, thank you!"

I dived out of the cruiser towards my new baby. She was a shiny light blue with a soft top and I loved her. I looked back to Charlie who had gotten out the cruiser and was leaning up against the door.

"What you going to call this one then?"

I thought for a second before coming up with the most perfect name.

"Sally. Like the song, remember?"

"Sally? It's perfect Bells. Now don't worry, I'm going to ship the car down to you tomorrow after you get on the plane so it should get there a few days after you."

My smile faltered when he said that, the bit about getting on a plane. I was really going.

"What's up? Don't you like the car?"

"No dad I love the car, I do. I guess it's just hit me now, I'm actually leaving tomorrow."

He walked round the car to me and wrapped his arms around me in the most un-Charlie-like way.

"You actually are."

The next morning I'd packed everything I needed, but didn't want to fly with, in the boot of Sally and my bags for the flight were in Charlie's car. Jess and Ang had come over to see me off and we were stood outside by the car. Charlie was still inside, probably doing one last check of my room to see if I'd left anything.

"I can't believe you're like travelling on your own. Aren't you like scared that you'll not know anyone?"

"Jess, I think that's why she's going. You know, to meet new people?"

"What's wrong with the people she knows now?"

They'd been like this since the moment they both arrived and I had yet to say more than "hi" to the both of them. I kept drifting out of the conversation when one of them would mention something I'd worried about during my sleepless night last night. I was excited to be going, but shit-scared at the same time. But I knew that if I didn't go then, I never would.

"Hey girls, come to see Bella off?"

"Yes Mr. Swan" they chorused.

I turned to see my dad walking down the path towards us. When he reached me he put his hand on my shoulder and leaned in to whisper in my ear.

"Do these two ever stop bickering?"

I giggled and shook my head as he said a bit louder "Ready to get going then Bells?"

I smiled up at him then walked over to my friends. We three-way-hugged and separated to have one last look at each other.

"Good luck Bella, I hope you find what you're looking for." Sometimes I'd forget how perceptive Ang was.

"Yeah Bella, I bet you'll get a killer tan, being in Texas and all. Send some pictures back, yeah?"

I nodded and smiled at them both.

"I'll miss you guys. Good luck in College and have a really good summer okay? I'll email you both I promise."

With one last hug I got inside the passenger seat of the car where my dad was waiting. We pulled out the drive and I waved goodbye to my friends who were stood on the sidewalk waving to me.

"You got your ticket Bells?"

I reached inside my jacket pocket and pulled out my plane ticket. My ticket to my new life. This one piece of paper was my entire future and at the time I wasn't fully sure how to feel about it.

"Yeah Dad, I got it."

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**A/N: So this was a really fast update (as in the day after posting the prologue). I guess I decided I was going to carry it on.**

**This chapter is just a background chapter really. **

**In the future I guess I'll try to update every week or so.**

**Feedback is always appreciated.**

**Peace&Love  
x**


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